26 May 2009

Tales from Pardes-I

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Its 7:45 PM and there's still daylight.My watch reads 5:15 AM.There's always this bull headed urge to do the math and calculate US time rather than reset the watch that was set in India.
Anyway , saying India umpteen times is just going to open the flood gates isn't it?So we think happy things.
Jetlag.Yesterday night , I woke up every 1.5 Hr intervals, in one such interval I noticed that the temperature sensor blinked "Please replace the batteries." , yes , it even had the full stop.And I wondered if I should call Amma(Would it be day time for her) or my sister(Is it 4AM ? That , would be day time for her).I wondered what would happen if I hadn't woken up that second 1.5 Hour interval.Would I have been hermetically sealed inside the room with a broken temperature sensor and no fresh air(when irony oh irony there were exactly 10 big trees outside my window?).But , of course!Switch off the sensor thingy(basic electronic circuit theory lesson 1) and open windows which will open exactly 4 inches upwards like the sticker on the window says.
I woke up again at 6AM and surprise surprise there was daylight.The nose had frozen though.
I reached home a couple of minutes back , after taxi driver from Pakistan Mr.Ada waved me a cheery goodbye.I fixed myself some "Tea from India" dutifully bought at the Indian Store(You know , it so ironic, back home I drink Twinings).And then I remembered the sensor needing battery.I called up the reception and promptly went for a shower.So there I was tra lalaing and there came a loud knock.Yes , of course Murphy was right.I opened the door to a cheery red capped old man.
CROM(Chery red capped old man): " helllo!!!"
Seren:"Hi!!"(This cute old thing is going to save me from being hermetically sealed etc etc)
CROM:"$##$$#$$##$$#"
Seren:"?"
Seren:"ENGLISH??"
CROM(*wincing coz of all the yelling*):"No"
Seren:*Hopefully*"Punjabi?"
CROM:"Spanish"
Seren: " Well, okay come in!"
CROM:*Peers at the sensor*
Seren the idiot:" See?It reads change battery , so will you?"
CROM:*Turns the knob towards heat and then pretends that hes feeling very very cold(crouches down on his knees and makes brr brr sounds followed by a happy face when the heat was turned up) and then turns the knob to cooling and pretends to fan himself*
Seren:"Cute old man , I know how the AC works,I didn't do that badly at college I say!!"
Seren:*Shows the message *
CROM:*Points to my index finger which has my voting mark and looks puzzled and hurt*
Seren:*Oh sheesh , how am I going to tell him I voted for BJP and thats where I got the dye!! Ammmaaa*
CROM:*Bulb switched on under the cap*"Oh.... no no!!No battery it electrical..No worry!"
Seren:*Accompanies CROM to the door and resolves to keep window open , the nose will just have to do with the freezing now , wont it!!*

25 May 2009

At Uncle Sams'

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The I is now in Umrica :)..more updates and posts to follow ..Jai ho!

07 May 2009

Result of Matrimony Chronicles -III

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Dhanya, you asked for it ;).

The story so far

Q is the latest matrimony matter.Q is phone-shy.I was supposed to meet aforesaid matter at 6.I vetoed the continental restaurant idea.As it is things are going very shamathuly, imagine meeting Q matter in Conti restaurant at 6.Nothing to eat also , no coffee also.So I vetoed.

I went about 5 minutes early and plonked myself at Vi , Viv's and my favorite table , the corner table facing the road.And conveniently got lost in Ponniyan Selvan.SMS at 18:00:00 sharp, unknown number reads(I don't store numbers until after the first meeting,no?)"I am here".I replied " :), come up I'm on the first floor".

And then Q came.And sat.And I smiled.And silence reigned.I started tapping feet to the tunes of "Jinke mari na".And then Q spoke.Two pearls dropped on to the table.

Q:"I'm a very shy , introverted,independent person"
Seren:"Hmmm..that's nice..I'm sure.."
Q:"And you?"
Seren: "I'm not shy , I think I'm an extrovert,but I'd say I was independent"
Q smiled understandingly..he knew what it was to find a fellow Independent.

The waiter who had dismissed us to be the "2 coffee-1 plate idly" variety was in for a shock.Because Q asked for the mocktail menu.Yes ,definite potential for a blog post.

The next 20 minutes went very similar to a 20-20 match.Here's how.

Q:What technology do you work on?
S:3GPP
Q:Doesn't that do technosoundingword version 3?
S:I think its version 4, not sure..
Q:It is version 3, I worked on it just last month
Score Q-1 S-0.

In an attempt to assuage the situation and not have Amma harp "But you don't give them a chance" I thought I'd shift the focus to Amma, well , she asked for it.Albeit in my head.

S:Last week , my Mom went walking in Lalbagh and a candidate came to campaign.Mom went and complained to him about the fact that she had two daughters and how unsafe it is for women in Karnataka given these situations.To this , the candidate grinned back sheepishly and mumbled that soon very soon something would be done to condone it.
(After this burst of bravado , Mrs Arjuna award came home and shivered wondering if the party goondas would be after her given she's a regular Lalbagh walker)
Q:So which party did she vote for this time around?
S:Its a secret ballot you know ;)
Score Q-1 S-1

Q:Ahem.So which places have you traveled to and what did you feel when you did.
S:I visited Agra last year and it was then that I was reading the Feast of Roses.It felt good to be visiting all the places that were spoken of in the book..But you know , I didn't really have an AHA moment when I saw the Taj Mahal , maybe owing to the fact that it was so crowded..and..
Q:Ok and which other place?
S:We visited Kerala this year
Q:I have covered the entire stretch up north and west.Only east is pending.
S:Really?I thought you said you hated traveling?
Q:Yes, I do.

Q:-infinity S:+infinity



I felt tired.This was worse than answering an interview.An hour of my life wasted right in front of my eyes...and then he bowled a googly.

Q:So, are you usually dressed like this?
S:*I looked down wondering if I forgot to wear my top.No .. didn't seem the case* "No , I dress differently in the swimming pool" (Another vain attempt at humor)
Q:Ok.. my Dad's very conservative firstly and secondly he doesn't like Iyers too much
S:Hain? *Ok and we met why?*
Q:But then , you know its all about DDLJ
S:Ok
Q:You know, convincing parents if you feel right about it.
S:Sure
Q:*Gets up suddenly as if something bit him(or hit him like I was itching to)* Let's go.
S:Yep.

Stick a fork in me,I'm done.
 

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